How to Take a Cab

For those of you new to the city, driving will seem like a suicide mission (notice how I don't say "at first driving will seem like a suicide mission", trust me, you never get used to it). People here drive like fucking maniacs, and that is not in any way an understatement. It's like there's someone giving away free money somewhere in the city and everybody knows about it but you. Cab drivers, truck drivers, hell, even soccer moms drive like they're at Le Mans. 

Don't despair, salvation comes in the form of a mid-nineties design Nissan sedan: 

Not the prettiest gal, but ol' Bessie will get you where you want to go

Why Would I Take a Cab?: Cabs are the difference between a night spent sleeping it off at home, or a night of overwhelming terror in jail. And don't get me started on how cheap they are compared to their American counterparts, 70 pesos (about $5.50 USD) gets you across town safe and sound. In some cases, depending on how much you drive, taking cabs to the office and back may end up being cheaper than what you pay for gas. Cabs are good, is I guess the gist of this post. 

How to Take a Cab: I really don't care where you are from in the States, but down here, taking a cab is pretty different than in most major American cities. You don't take cabs on the street. Unless, of course, you feel like playing Russian Roulette with your life (more on that in a sec...). You do want to learn the word sitio. As in sitio de taxis, or in English, Taxi Stand. Since these generally have to be licensed by the city to operate (the rules get a little iffy outside of the city), which makes them a hell of a lot safer than street cabs (gypsy cabs if you will), where, up until recently, the only requirement was a car, some paint, and a driver's license.

Why Can't I Take a Street Cab?: If it makes you feel good about yourself, by all means take one. Just don't come crying to me when you find yourself wearing a hood over you head, in a dingy basement, while the kidnappers decide what to do with you. Or you could find yourself in just a straight up mugging situation, in which case your only worry is whether or not the cab driver (or his accomplice)  will shoot you even if you give him your wallet/purse. 

The smug face of terror...

Should I Tip The Driver?: You don't have to unless you feel like it, the driver will probably not chase you down demanding a tip.

Tip: Know where the hell you are going when you get in a cab. If the cab driver smells indecision, he will take the longest route possible with the most traffic and run the meter up as much as he can.